Do you suffer from FOMO?
- Details
- Published on 02 January 2014
- Written by Steve Streight
There is a mental health issue spawned by Facebook called FOMO. Fear of Missing Out.
FOMO is a serious condition. Do you know the signs?
When you see people posting about how happy they are, how much they love their children or husbands, or how much they like some toy or product, if you aren't experiencing these same joys, you can become jealous, bitter, and depressed.
You scroll through your Facebook newsfeed. On and on they go, bragging about their adventures, vacations, parties, and wild times. But you're broke or sick or otherwise unable to share in such things. You feel inferior. You feel cheated. You start to envy them.
You've got FOMO.
FOMO can strike anyone at anytime.
FOMO occurs when people talk on Facebook about a tech conference they're attending. You couldn't make it. You feel left out. Or when people speak of a fantastic restaurant they dined at, complete with photos of the food. You can't afford to dine at such a fancy joint. You feel like your life is not as rich and resplendent as theirs.
An extreme form of FOMO is when you are so obsessed with the fun, success, and happiness of others, you compulsively check your text messages, emails, and Facebook all day and all night, every day and every night.
You dread not knowing about activities that you think are totally fulfilling. You can't stand being out of the loop on the latest gossip and quarrels.
Facebook has a grip on you that you simply cannot escape. If you wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, you impulsively reach for your smart phone and check on what's going on. You lug your mobile device everywhere you go, in great fear to be disconnected.
You have entirely forgotten the good old days when you did things in silence, without interruption, and actually use your mind to imagine, ponder, and plan. Discontent settles in. You think that what you're doing right now is far less exciting or interesting than what others are doing.
You don't stop to consider that people tend to post about the best things in their lives and often exaggerate, due to being drunk or temporarily ecstatic. You don't witness the ugly, boring, stupid things in the lives of others, because they typically refrain from communicating such things. All you mostly see are the good things, the happy images, the achievements — and you grow weary of being you.
You may feel okay about your own life — until you go to Facebook and watch the endless parade of success, enthusiasm, and opportunities that are passing you by. The more you scroll, the worse FOMO gets. It grows within you like a cancer. It eats you up inside. FOMO is destroying you.
You suddenly have a moment of truth. You realize in an instant you've become immature, dependent, insecure. Like a pampered crybaby, you whine inside and moan about how much better everybody else's life is compared to yours.
Your fear of missing out has enslaved you and there is no rehab clinic to set you free with expensive therapy. You are a pawn in the flux of messages, announcement, photos, and celebrations. Your life seems miserable, hollow, worthless in comparison.
You can't keep up with all the events and experiences that others are wallowing in, but you try anyway. You must keep trying. You cannot give up. You're enmeshed.
You may even die from FOMO if you're so sick with this disease that you have to check your smart phone while you're driving your car, get distracted by a text or Facebook update, and get in a fatal collision.
The only known cure for FOMO is disconnection and contemplation, in silence and solitude, on the real blessings in your life. Being thankful, away from Facebook, for all the wonderful things that you experience is the antidote to the FOMO virus.
Put down your smart phone, close your laptop, shove aside your tablet, walk away from your PC. Step out into the immediate experience of what you've got going for you now. Appreciate your life, your family, your past, present, and future. Get to know, like never before, how truly fortunate you are, without needing to compare and contrast your life with the highlights of the lives of others.
Post a photo of that bowl of Ramen noodles or that peanut butter and raspberry preserves sandwich you had for lunch. Be proud of it. Rave about how satisfying it is.
Accentuate the little things that are luxuries and extravagant opulence to impoverished people of the world.
The fact that you're alive is enough. If you're also in fairly good health, not in prison, not in a mental asylum, not homeless — you've got an elevated status. Your husband isn't beating you every day? Your teenage son has not tried to shoot you? Your job pays the bills? You have a lot to rejoice in.
FOMO doesn't have to cripple and corrupt you until you drown in total and irrevocable despair. Learn to be happy seeing others happy, but don't let their triumphs cause you to denigrate the beautiful life that you're living. While you were envying others, many of them may have been envying you.
The Grand National, All-American Literarea Annual Book Review, Part II: The Legend of Curly’s Gold
- Details
- Published on 01 January 2014
- Written by Kevin Kizer
Well, 2013 was <insert something clever, reflective> and hopefully 2014 will be <insert something positive, uplifting>!
Since I’m not one for the “My year in review!” columns – too self indulgent for even someone as self-indulgent as I – I’ll just stick to listing all the books I read in 2013 along with a one sentence review/description of each. In many cases, I've written reviews about many of these books in the Literarea section of The Peorian website. Now, ensconce yourself in another year of my lit-nerdiness.
Note: (R) denotes a previously read book
1) "Ashoka: India's Lost Emperor", Charles Allen, 460pg.
Although he came to power through war and violence, he renounced them both and turned to Buddhism with his peaceful reign extending from India north to the Himalayas and west to Kandahar.
2) "Inventing Wine: A New History of One of the World's Most Ancient Pleasures", Paul Lukas, 350pg.
Don’t bitch about bad wine because up until Pasteur discovered yeast fermentation and how bacteria caused spoilage, most wine – unless very, very fresh – would have been quite nasty by our standards.
3) "The Barbarous Years: The Peopling of British North America", Bernard Bailyn, 640pg.
Holy crap, did we have violent beginnings – and I’m talking 100 years before the Revolution, where the goal was to out torture your enemies.
4) "The Great Pearl Heist: London's Greatest Thief and Scotland Yard's Hunt for the World's Most Valuable Necklace", Molly Caldwell Crosby, 304pg.
This was an interesting story of how old-timey detective work unraveled a brilliant crime back in the pre-scientific times.
5) "P.G. Wodehouse: A Life in Letters", Sophie Ratcliffe, 602pg.
P.G. Wodehouse’s letters are as entertaining as his Jeeves stories – especially when he gets into critiquing American pop culture.
6) "Libra" (R), DeLillo, 480pg.
My first and very favorite DeLillo book which is a fictionalized account of the JFK assassination before that became a popular thing.
7) "Gravity's Rainbow" (R), Pynchon, 760pg.
Pynchon is one of the few writers who can come close to the strata occupied by Joyce.
8) "Go" (R), John Clellon Holmes, 352pg.
If you are interested in the Beat Generation and want a straightforward account by one of Kerouac, Ginsberg and Cassady's buddies, check out this book.
9) "Paris is a Nice Dish: Its Recipes and Restaurants", Osbourne Putnam Stearnes
I nabbed this ‘50s book off the shelves of Miss Morron’s home in Peoria and it includes all kinds of tips for the Parisian traveler – including the best way (I shit you not) to procure a lady of the night.
10) "Fractured Spirits: Hauntings at the Peoria State Hospital", Sylvia Shults, 222pg.
I have zero belief in ghosts, angels or any type of supernatural superstition, but this book does a great job detailing the groundbreaking mental health care that occurred at this institution back when “mental health care” was otherwise non-existent.
11) "Wedlocked", Jay Ponteri, 150pg.
An incredibly touching and poignant memoir by an old friend that takes a serious look at love and the modern American family.
12) "God Is Not Great" (R), Hitchens, 307pg.
It got him a lot of attention, but there are lots of other books by Hitch well worth reading that have nothing to do with religion.
13) "The Great Agnostic: Robert Ingersoll and American Free Thought", Susan Jacoby, 256pg.
Peoria has a long history of rebellious behavior and Robert Ingersoll was the pater familias, someone who, in the words of Thomas Edison, “had all the attributes of a perfect man.”
14) "Every Love Story is a Ghost Story: A Life of David Foster Wallace", (R), DT Max, 356pg.
Max argues that Wallace’s work focused on secondhand desire, how our passions are no longer our own and how in the media age we are nothing but minds waiting to be filled, emotions waiting to be manipulated.
15) "The Western Canon: The Books and Schools of the Ages", (R) Harold Bloom, 560pg.
This is the book that made me really get into classic lit (Cervantes, Dante, Chaucer, Dickens and Montaigne, in particular) – long live Harold Bloom!!
16) "The Plantagenets: The Warrior Kings and Queens Who Made England", Susan Jacoby, 560pg.
This fascinating book covers nearly 250 years of the Plantagenet reign, from 1154 to 1399 when Henry of Bolingbroke overthrew Richard II.
17) "Kennesaw Mountain: Sherman, Johnston and the Atlanta Campaign", Earl J. Hess, 322pg.
One of the most brutal (and pointless) confrontations of the Civil War, as the Confederates tried to slow the Union drive to Atlanta.
18) "Onward Toward What We're Going Toward", Ryan Bartelmay, 324pg.
This is a very good first novel by a central Illinois native with a sweeping narrative and Morton as the focal point.
19) "Edmund Burke: The First Conservative", Jesse Norman, 336pg.
He was a conservative with a lower case “c” in that he was a fierce champion of human rights and against imperialism.
20) "Goodbye Again: The Definitive Peter Cook and Dudley Moore", (R) William Cook, 389pg.
Before there was Monty Python, there was Pete and Dud.
21) “Wrestling Li Po for the Remote”, Kevin Stein, 112pg.
We have a treasure here in Peoria with Illinois Poet Laureate Kevin Stein.
22) “A Confederacy of Dunces” (R), John Kennedy Toole, 394pg.
This is a favorite of mine that definitely falls into the category of the Great American Novel.
23) “Intuition Pumps and Other Tools for Thinking”, Daniel Dennett, 496pg.
Give your mind some exercise because it could always use it.
24) “Everything and More: A Compact History of Infinity”, David Foster Wallace, 336pg.
A mind-crunching look at infinity on a macro (BIG) and micro (infinitesimally small) level.
25) “Signifying Rappers: Rap and Race in the Urban Present”, David Foster Wallace & Mark Costello, 142pg.
If one more person criticizes DFW for dismissing the Beastie Boys after “Licensed to Ill”, I will lose my mind – the group didn’t show serious artistic promise until “Paul’s Boutique” which came out AFTER this was written.
26) “Tesla: Inventor of the Modern Age”, Bernard W. Carlson, 500pg.
When it comes to the great inventors of the electrical age, for some reason, Nikola Tesla is generally overlooked in American textbooks.
27) “An Appetite For Wonder: The Making of a Scientist”, Richard Dawkins, 304pg.
Just like Christopher Hitchens, there’s a lot more to this man than being just a “prominent atheist” and this book is all science, so fear not.
28) “Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls”, David Sedaris, 275pg.
This was my first (and definitely not last) jump into the humorous short stories and essays of David Sedaris, recommended to me repeatedly by mi hermano, Josh.
29) “My Man Jeeves and Other Early Jeeves Stories”, P.G. Wodehouse, 202pg.
You cannot go wrong with P.G. Wodehouse if you like intelligent, dry, gut-busting British humor.
30) “Love, Poverty and War: Journals and Essays”, Hitchens, 482pg.
This is a wonderful compilation of Hitchens’s best columns and essays reaching back to the 1980s.
31) “Continental Divide: Wildlife, People, and the Border Wall”, Krista Schlyer, 192pg.
This book (words and photographs by another dear, old friend) shows that while politics may take front and center when it comes to the U.S./Mexico border wall, there are much bigger issues at stake.
32) “Furious Cool: Richard Pryor and the World That Made Him”, David Henry, 297pg.
Before I die there will be an annual Richard Pryor Celebration in Peoria.
33) “Fate, Time and Language: An Essay on Free Will”, DFW, 264pg.
DFW takes on Richard Taylor’s 1962 theory of Fatalism in a way no philosopher has to date.
34) “Wittgenstein”, Hans Sluga, 168pg.
Yeah, some light reading to end the year.
Partnership with Louisville Slugger brings sports complex to the plate
- Details
- Published on 19 December 2013
- Written by Paul Gordon
In 14-plus years running Eastside Center in East Peoria, Dan Cunningham has learned what it takes to stage top-notch softball tournaments to a multi-field complex that draw teams from all over the state and region.
That expertise landed him a new job starting the first of the year. As director of the Louisville Slugger Sports Complex planned for Peoria's northwest corner, Cunningham will oversee construction of the 10-field, indoor-outdoor complex while building from scratch a schedule of baseball and softball tournaments that could draw people from across the continent.
The complex, which will be operating within a year, plans to eventually host 11,000 competitive games each year, drawing more than a quarter million people to Peoria and using the Louisville Slugger brand to turn it into one of the country's top bat-and-ball venues.
"With the kind of brand recognition Louisville Slugger gives this project, we will have instantly credibility wherever we go," Cunningham said. "Already, we are hearing from tournament sponsors and the like, wanting to know more and wanting to get in line. We're excited."
The complex, which has been quietly in the planning stages for close to two years, is the brainchild of local businessman Mark Petersen, owner of Petersen Health Care and Petersen Hotels. Petersen approached Cunningham to tap his expertise about what it would take to make it work; that began a relationship that led to Louisville and a partnership in the $33 million project between Petersen and the world's top maker of baseball and softball bats.
"I knew for the project to work it would need more clout, somebody with a worldwide name. I approached Louisville Slugger because I had become aware they were starting to refocus on marketing diamond sports to families, to get America's youth interested in baseball again. And let's face it; will people be more apt to come and be in a tournament at the Peoria Sports Complex or the Louisville Slugger Sports Complex?
"We plan to make it an experience for the whole family," Cunningham said.
The complex will have 10 outdoor fields for softball and youth baseball, all sporting all-synthetic turf with significant drainage capabilities. Year-round play will be possible in the 125,000 square foot dome capable of holding multiple diamonds as well as fielding other sports.
The complex also will include a new Holiday Inn hotel to boost the number of rooms available in that part of the city, or what soon will be part of the city. The Peoria City Council next month will vote to annex the land on Orange Prairie Road, near the Shoppes at Grand Prairie. The council also is expected to establish a special service district that would include the complex, the new hotel and the other Petersen Hotels properties nearby on which a special tax would be levied to repay bonds the city is likely to issue.
City officials have been quoted saying the project should be a significant revenue generator for Peoria. It eventually could generate more than 50,000 hotel/motel room nights a year, Cunningham said.
It is obvious Louisville Slugger officials expect big things from the complex, which will be the first that company has been part of in the country.
"Our company has a long history of leaving its mark on baseball and softball," said Kyle Schlegel, Louisville Slugger's vice president of marketing, Kyle Schlegel. "Louisville Slugger is honored to join with the Peoria community in what will be one of the very best facilities of its kind in America. I assure you, this is not hyperbole. Peoria and the Louisville Slugger Sports Complex will become the new number-one destination for youth baseball and softball in the Midwest and, for many, the best in the nation."
The company said the complex is expected to draw a majority of participants from the 23 million people within 300 miles of Peoria. "However, the magnificent facility, entertaining family experience and stellar reputation of the Louisville Slugger brand are expected to also attract interest and participants from across North America," it said in a news release.
Schlegel said the company plans to emphasize memorable family experiences through diamond sports at the complex.
"We were sold on becoming partners when we learned of the dedication, commitment and experience of the team of people in Peoria that's been assembled to plan, develop and implement this amazing project, headed by the tireless Dan Cunningham," Schlegel said. "Dan and the Louisville Slugger Sports Complex intend to provide the very best sports experience possible for young athletes and their families."
The experience for players and families will include a big-league atmosphere with major-league, walk-out-style dugouts, bullpens, lights, electronic scoreboards and public address systems. Even the restrooms and concession areas will be special, Cunningham said. "They will be so clean every mother will be happy," he said.
Opening ceremonies will include a brilliant laser show and video welcome played on the ceiling of the dome. It is hoped the video will include message from people like Jim Thome, Joe Girardi and Ben Zobrist, all of whom started playing baseball in the Peoria region and made it to the Major Leagues. Thome recently retired after a Hall of Fame career with several teams, while Girardi was with many teams as a player and now is manager of the New York Yankees. Zobrist is an all-star infielder for the Tampa Bay Rays.
Louisville Slugger's branding and merchandise will be prominent. The 130-year-old company, supplier of equipment to players from Babe Ruth to Jackie Robinson and Roberto Clemente to Derek Jeter and Buster Posey, will create a Youth Hall of Fame section on its website that will feature every player who participates in tournaments at the Louisville Slugger Sports Complex. years to come. Also, every player in Louisville Slugger Hall of Fame events will receive a personalized Louisville Slugger bat as a keepsake.
The partnership agreement gives Louisville Slugger naming rights to the complex, use of the facility for special marketing events such as showcases and product demonstrations, and product merchandising, among other things. The parties also plan to cooperate on development of a Louisville Slugger smart phone application to promote events and provide information to players and their families.
Cunningham said it was quickly established that Louisville Slugger and Petersen had similar goals. "This is to be a youth complex, a place for youth to get an experience they can't get anywhere else. That's the message we all wanted. We want these participants to walk away from here not caring how many games they won or lost but thinking about the great experience they had, the great experience their family had," he said.
The dome will be up and operating next fall, Cunningham said, meaning it will be available for programming all next winter. The rest of the complex could be operational by the n but for sure by spring of 2015, he added. "A nice thing about using synthetic turf is that we won't have to wait for grass to grow," he said.
Cunningham finishes his duties in East Peoria, where he also is director of tourism and special events, on Dec. 31.
"Sure, I'll miss it and the people I have worked with. But this is something I couldn't turn down. Mark Petersen recruited me because he wanted somebody who didn't have a learning curve. But it is still going to be a whole new ballgame. I can't wait to really get going," he said.
A Literarea Review: Continental Divide: Wildlife, People, and the Border Wall
- Details
- Published on 27 December 2013
- Written by Kevin Kizer
Continental Divide: Wildlife, People, and the Border Wall
Krista Schlyer
Texas A&M University Press
“Even with a wall blocking their way, many humans will succeed. Wildlife will not.”
When you hear someone referred to as a “photojournalist," the emphasis is usually on the first two syllables of that somewhat Frankensteined word. But Krista Schlyer shows in her latest book, “Continental Divide: Wildlife, People and the Border Wall”, that she is as adept with a camera as she is with the written word.
Having said that I must admit I might be a bit biased in the matter. That’s because the author is a good friend from my high school and college days in northern Indiana. In fact, I recall vividly the last time I was lucky enough to enjoy Krista’s company. It was September 12, 1996, in Tucson, Ariz., where she was living and I was visiting. How can I be so sure of the date? Easy. I am a hip-hop fan and on the next day in Las Vegas, Tupac was killed.
On that day, she picked me up in her car and took me on a tour up nearby Mount Lemon. I call it a tour because every so often she would stop to point out some unique natural feature or take me on a short hike to one breathtaking vantage point after another, culminating with lunch at a chalet-like restaurant at a near-alpine height. She clearly knew and had a love for the mountain, and was a gracious host.
Along with having a love for nature in general, when I think of the author’s earlier years I recall a very smart, driven and determined person, and all of those traits are evident in her new book. But enough of the backstory…
The topic of the border wall between Mexico and the U.S. is one of the most ugly and sad political issues of our time. But the true impact has been lost in the bumper sticker banter of the 24-hour news networks.
The goal of the border wall was to stop the flow of illegal Mexican laborers, which it has failed to do (jobs trump barriers). But in something of a cruel twist it has stopped the flow of entirely different creatures, like the Sonoran pronghorn antelope herds that have been freely traveling these arid lands eons before American businesses began actively seeking out illegal laborers.
And the pronghorn are just one victim. There are literally hundreds of others – from the kit fox and gray wolf to ocelots and jaguars to frogs and birds to plant life and…the list goes on and on. While it may be a border to us, to them it’s a migration corridor (but then again, there are probably those who are against “Mexican animals” taking food from “American animals”).
As I mentioned earlier Schlyer’s photographic skills are equaled by her journalistic skills. In this book you will find stunning and unique images of the wildlife, vegetation and people of the region, interwoven with a dramatic narrative of what has become an environmental (and a human) disaster.
But make no mistake – this is not propaganda of the tree-hugging, hippie variety. Schlyer shows how both the political left and right, in ham-fisted attempts to mollify voters through wasted activity, are equally to blame.
Here it is in a nutshell: during the Clinton era, in a stunning example of battling the effect (illegal immigration) instead of the cause (American businesses actively seeking out illegal immigrants to make a cheap buck), Operation Gatekeeper was initiated.
The idea was to make it impossible for Mexicans to enter the U.S. through larger cities like San Diego, which would somehow reduce crime. With their only recourse being the remote desert, it was thought that Mexicans would be deterred from making the attempt. But again, jobs trump obstacles. And bodies started turning up in the desert. Hundreds of them. And instead of reducing crime, there was – and continues to be – a surge.
“This border – and the laws and social climate surrounding it recently – suggest our allegiance to a country’s legal code should be stronger than our connection to another human being.”
But the main focus of this book is the accidental victims. While you will see breathtaking photos of Pronghorn running in the Chihuahuan grasslands and buff-bellied hummingbirds grooming, you will also see heartrending photos of javelina turning away from the wall after traveling hundreds of yards looking for a place to cross and Sonoran desert toads lying dead at the foot of the wall, with the sought-after body of water on the other side.
Along with providing a political perspective, Schlyer gives a historical context to show how the impact on wildlife, landowners and border towns has been glossed over – or ignored perhaps is the better word. Ignored because to tell this story requires a true journalistic effort, i.e. hard work. And as we know true journalistic efforts are few and far between.
“Where there are borders…it is easy to amplify fears to the point that they distort reality.”
But don’t take my somewhat-biased word for it. “Continental Divide” has been awarded the National Outdoor Book Award, the American Library Association’s “Best of the Best” award, the Southwest Book of the Year award and the Eric Hoffer Award (awarded for “salient writing” and “the independent spirit of small publishers”).
This truly is a vital and important work, perfect for those who simply love great nature photography as well as those who are alarmed by the environmental and human impact of a continent divided.
Players, Civic Chorale programs set for this weekend
- Details
- Published on 18 December 2013
- Written by Paul Gordon
Christmas music, including the classics and newer pieces, will take the stage at two local venues this weekend, perhaps a welcome break from shopping.
"I'll Be Home for Christmas: A Holiday Cabaret" will be presented at Peoria Players Theatre, University and Lake streets, at 7:30 p.m. on Friday and Saturday. Tickets are $15 and are on sale now. Call 688-4473.
This is the second year for "I'll Be Home for Christmas" and like the inaugural show it will feature performers who for one reason or another have left Peoria. Last year the show was strong with performers who now live in New York City or Chicago, working to make it as professional entertainers, who came back to see relatives for the holidays.
This year there will be several performers who are college students home for the holidays, said Jimmy Ulrich, who is co-directing the show with Erin Wood Miller. "We have really nice mix of students home from college and community theatre veterans. All will be singing, some dancing. We want to put everyone in a holiday mood," he said.
Community theatre veterans performing will be Steve Bortolotti, Barb Couri, Bryan Blanks, Erica Franken, Derek Kimler, Kelly Kooken-Nehls, and Michelle and Steve Rouland. In addition, dancers from The Tap Shack, owned and operated by Franken, will perform.
College students performing in the show will be Amber Baer, Rusty Brost, Wes Hunt, Katie Paternaga, Jessi Palkovic and David Brown.
Santa and Mrs. Claus will also appear, Ulrich said.
"Last year's show went over very well and we wanted to continue that. We wanted some kind of holiday show to help people get into the holiday spirit and to give them something to do when they need a break from Christmas shopping," he said.
Also this weekend the Peoria Civic Chorale will have its annual holiday concert, "An American Family Christmas," at the Caterpillar Performing Arts Center at Five Points in Washington.
Show times are 7:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday and 2:30 p.m. on Sunday. Tickets are $20 for adults and $12 for students in advance or $25 for adults and $15 for students at the door. Contact the Peoria Civic Chorale business office at 309-693-6725 for tickets.
The Civic Chorale is planning a show that will include soulful renditions of traditional carols, gems of choral literature, and some musical surprises "as we celebrate this magical time of the year with the uplifting and soul-stirring power of live choral music."
The Chorale said selections include In the Bleak Mid-Winter, contemporary versions of While Shepherds Watched Their Flocks and Frosty the Snowman, and Benjamin Britten's masterful work, This Little Babe.
There also will be appearances by the PACC Youth Chorus, Young Artist Competition winners, and a variety of small ensemble and instrumental groups, the Chorale said on its website.